Whispering Shadow

I love what I currently do. The problem with loving what you do is that you are always thinking about it - for me 'it' is my classroom. I have only felt partially detached from my work when I am running - focusing all my thoughts and energy on finishing the extra lap. That has not happened much off late. Since nothing else is equally effective, my personal time has not entirely been my own. However today, miraculously, I was able to cut myself off for the whole 108 minutes of watching 'Before Midnight'. If you like a rosy fast paced romance with its highs and lows making way for a happy ending, this is NOT the movie for you. If your idea of a romantic movie is one that combines the colours of a strong rationale and authentic emotion against a backdrop of reality, then 'Before Midnight' is a must watch. Richard Linklater is exceptional as director (again!) and Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy have stayed brutally true to their character portrayal of Jesse and Celin...

People had told me that I won't have the time to write at institute. I had always thought I would find time to write, despite the hectic pace of the schedule. I was wrong. The five weeks I spent at the institute preparing for my teaching stint were the longest of my life in many ways. They seemed long because my day was packed from 7AM in the morning till 11PM in the night. They seemed long because of the over whelming amount of information that was shared with us. They seemed long because of how much I learned. They seemed long because of the number of highs and lows that were packed in them - as many as there would have been in a typical year of  'normal' living. They seemed long because I was cut off from the world and the people I love in a manner I had never been before. Above all, they seemed long because I feel I know and trust the people I met here at the same level as I have known and trusted my closest friends. These five weeks seemed long, but they were unfo...

I finally met half of the 140 sixth graders I will be teaching over the next two years, along with my team of three other fellows. Majority of them have been with Teach for India for four years but initial assessment results have shown that they lag behind their grade level considerably (some at an emergent level - which means at a KG level of reading fluency). Reasons for low achievement levels have been aplenty and at this point, I do not have enough information to deduce which of those are facts and which opinions. Let me present some of the facts.My school is run by a large Shia trust and is one of the largest in the Shivaji Nagar area. The class is mostly composed of Shia Muslims (around 60-70%) and Sunni Muslims (around 30-35%) and one-two Hindu student. An intriguing thing is that the school is next to one of the largest dumping grounds in the Chembur-Ghatkopar area - in which people claim bodies of victims of the gang violence are found. This gang violence is a reason why pa...

With the monsoon, begins my new journey as a teacher. I can't wait to head to Pune and start the process of learning to become one. I don't think five weeks can prepare me for everything there is to teaching. I don't think five decades are enough for that!! But yes, I will learn to independently manage a classroom, to teach kids creatively so that they learn faster than they otherwise would and to utilize the resources available to me to keep improving in the classroom.  Like nature welcomes the rains without hesitance, I will open my mind to ideas, opinions and people that will help me build new perspectives. Like the streams of water trickling down the slope in the forest, I will find my way through or around problems, no matter how tough or long the path is. Like the first offshoot of grass that breaks its way through the hardened soil, I will start breaking the mould I have built around me, thanks to an education and career that has taught me and sometimes forced me ...

This question is not the same as "What do I want to accomplish in the two years of the fellowship?" While its answer may partially overlap with the reasons for which I am joining Teach for India  (learning to be a teacher, working at the grassroot level in an entrepreneurial way, networking with like minded people, building leadership qualities), it is still incomplete. What I wish to take away from the classroom cannot be summed up in big words like these. It is not about surviving the two years ordeal and proving to myself that I made it. I can be mediocre and disinterested and live through far worse. I will still have these points on my resume. It is making each of the 700 days count, celebrating small victories and learning from every setback - making myself more tenacious. It is about making friends with 30 children and helping them discover their potential further - learning to become approachable, fair and less judgmental. It is about removing the roadblocks in t...

एक ज़िन्दगी है जीने के लिए  फिर डर डर के बिताये क्यूँ ? कई रास्तें हैं चलने के लिए  गलत राह पे समय गवाएं क्यूँ? आज दिल की आवाज़  सुनों,  कल शोर और भी होगा। आज नए ख्वाब बुनों, कल ज़िम्मेदारी का भोज भी होगा। अन्धकार है बहुत दुनिया में हर एक लौ अमूल्य है  खुद को उज्जवल किये बिना  तेरे अस्तित्व का क्या मूल्य है?. हम सबको एक दिन राक बनकर  मिट्टी में मिल जाना है। फिर आग में जलने से क्यूँ डरना  जब मरने से पहले मोक्ष पाना है? PS: This is the first Hindi post on my blog. I don't remember whether I even wrote in Hindi after school. Having shared a Hindi poem with my friend led to a conversation in Hindi verses, which became the inspiration for the rest of this poem. In retrospect, I think when it comes to writing poetry, Hindi is a much better language than English - inherently poetic. 

I was in grade four. I had to read the 'thought for the day' in the school assembly, my first experience in public speaking. It w as two simple sentences - “A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.” The host introduced me when my turn came. Needless to say, I was nervous. The teacher who had  nominated me for the task literally pushed me on the dais. I went up to the stage and without adjusting the microphone, read the quote, fumbled with a two- three words (25% of all I had in my kitty) said a thank you and rushed off the dais. Aft er I walked off the stage, the next speaker spoke. Once he finished, my housemaster came up to me and said - "You read well. Did you notice how he spoke (pointing to the next speaker)? You must take a few cues from him to become even better." That was a big moment - my housemaster had personally acknowledged my presence. The onus was on me to live up to his expectations. From then on, I spoke frequently d...