Whispering Shadow

I can't imagine how much more difficult the last two years would have been without each of you. You have been with me through each trial and tribulation and through every success and jubilation. You are the incredible 11 who I have had the fortune of working with during the 2 years of the fellowship - my co-fellows, my co-travelers and my friends. I am writing this post to deeply express my gratitude to you. Pritish,  I worked more closely with you than anyone else in the team. We had our backs against the wall with the children barely showing any progress at the end of year 1. We put our heads together to envision a classroom like Jafari hadn't seen in a long time. We saw a part of that vision become a reality, even though the reality was short lived. We were able to drive a sense of focus and a love of learning in many kids - sparks of which are still alive in many of the kids. We were consistent in our high expectations, which has forever made me believe that a...

This is an ongoing post in which I want to capture some of my reflections on progress in my classroom and its students as I reach the end of my fellowship. 1) My students have deeper self-awareness about their values. When I started, my students did not know the meaning of 'strength' and 'weakness'. Yesterday, when I was having a sharing circle, all the students who have been with me for the whole last year were able to identify their strengths and areas of development. Not just that, they were able to choose deeper values like 'empathy', 'compassion', 'grit' as some of their answers. They still have a long way to go till the actively work on their area of development - but at least the acceptance is a good start.  2) Some of my students have become intelligent conversationalists. Whenever I used to have a guest in class, students would ask questions which were highly factual with almost no follow through. Now, they engage in meanin...

2014 has been the year that tested my tenacity in more than one way. The year posed many challenges on both the personal and professional front, which took away incredible amount of energy from me. I wanted to end the year on a high, but on the contrary, I am feeling at my lowest ever. My marriage, being the largest exercise in managing egos of diverse stake holders, took away my focus from my classroom. My students, who were on the path of transformation, have now lost the momentum towards their goals thanks to my distracted inputs and the absence of my co-teacher and thought partner. I am mentally tough and well planned, which has helped me deal well with the stress, but I am disappointed with the permanence of the outcomes which my dedicated effort in the classroom have yielded. Everyone tells me that I have fared fairly well considering the circumstances. For me, these two years were not about surviving, they were about pushing the limits of my belief, of what I can achieve. I h...

Mehak is one of the advanced readers in my classroom who demonstrates a high degree of value based leadership and takes immense pride in her team’s and her own learning. In the month of September 2014, our team was struggling with two out of four fellows in the grade being out of action due to severe illness and the rest of us struggling with our own wellbeing. As a contingency plan, we had to reshuffle fellows among grades 7 and 8 to ensure continuity of learning. Due to the sudden changes in class structures and increased number of students to manage, the quality and quantity of my interaction with my own class fell significantly. I was feeling dejected that I couldn’t finish the term on a high after starting off on a strong footing. Noticing my mood, Mehak wrote to me a letter. Among the many things she wrote, she mentioned how I was the one who told her “how each chapter links to the vision” and “made her goals more clear”; how I showed her the “importance of friendship” by “c...

This week has been one of the toughest weeks of my life for many reasons. The good news is it is over. I need to adapt to the changed circumstances and quickly regain the momentum. Before I get lost in the craziness of planning and execution, I want to spend a few minutes looking at the bright side of the week that went by. I am thankful to Pritish for reaching out and considering me a true friend. I am thankful for how Metamorphians saw this week through. This week gave me a chance to see the independence which my kids have achieved. They were incredible. In a week when I was lost and lessons were haphazard, they held the class together on their own, showing tremendous patience with me and a lot of grace under pressure in handling the class. I owe them a celebration. I am thankful that our 7th grade team is reunited. We had parted for the sake of consistency and connect with the kids, but circumstances have brought us back together. As Neerja and I were thinking about the new s...

Inheriting a history of repeated failure, Yet achieving the impossible in his tenure, Wounded in battle, but standing tall in the war. What is this man made of? Completing a journey of a million hurdles, While his own demons he handles, Tired on the path, but always in motion. What is that man made of? Making a voice heard in a jungle of chaos, Speaking with courage for a worthy cause, Choosing the right, rather than the easy path. What is this man made of? Remaining calm in the face of calamity, Holding back anger as a reflex to stupidity, Never showing frustration, but reason What is the man made of? Melting hearts that were frozen since ages, Lending a ear to the ones in dark cages, Free falling often, yet being a pillar of strength  What is that man made of? Working without support nor appreciation, Never boastful of his contribution, Of a royal stature, yet living in a humble abode What is that man made of? ...

My first year of the fellowship is almost nearing an end. It has been one crazy roller coaster ride with its share of highs and lows. I have too many things on my mind and I am hoping by writing them down, I will free up some much needed mind space for other equally important things. Showing gratitude was one of my new year resolutions. I want to end the year by thanking everyone (or everything) who (which) has helped me see this through. In no specific order, I would like to acknowledge: My students, Mehak and Aliya , for constantly showing me the mirror and setting high expectations of me in the classroom - whether it is in my conduct or in my effort. My students, Muzammil and Awesh , for making me see that permanent change has no easy fixes. My students, Alfiya and Farheen , for making me believe that transformation is possible and there is a leader in each of us that is waiting to be discovered. My students , in general, for all the love and for providing me the toughest ch...